Inhale Confidence, Exhale Self Doubt
Throughout my career, particularly in the early days but also true today, I have personally experienced the scenario expressed in an article written by Beth Comstock “The Road Not Taken – How to respond when your boss says “be more confident”.
I have also mentored or coached other individuals who felt same but couldn’t see in themselves what I and others could – the incredible value they had to offer and the contribution they could make. They could express their thoughts, ideas, and opinions one on one or in the safety of a trusted group, but felt paralysed in other forums and sat quietly until prompted or at times, said nothing at all. Fast forward, the next conversation I had with them often went along the lines of “I wish I could have raised” or “I really wanted to but”, “thank you for supporting me in bringing that up……”.
Confidence to be heard, to sound credible, to believe their input would be valued. The other factor, is belief in themselves and them questioning their competence. I can’t count the number of times I heard people say “I am not as confident as you” and yet, at times, I also suffered from a lack of confidence and self belief that apparently didn’t show. Well it was felt by me too – I was not nor am I immune.
As soon as I began reading the Introduction of the book “The Confidence Code” by Katty Kay & Claire Shipman I immediately related. The book also helped to reinforce that women of all walks of life, regardless of their positions, their successes and the inspiration they give others, have felt or experienced a lack of confidence and self belief. If you haven’t already read this book, I would highly recommend it.
It’s not always easy, timing is not always perfect, it can be downright intimidating and there is no doubt it takes practice. In it’s best form, confidence can be very rewarding, at it’s worst, extremely undermining, soul destroying and self sabotaging. The affects can have a significant impact across both your professional and personal life.
Believe in yourself – with each step outside your comfort zone, comes great steps in confidence and huge strides forward. Realise you are not unique when it comes to self doubt, it seems to be a universal problem, but it can be overcome which is the best news.
This is why I started Revivify to support women to overcome a range of hurdles, to believe in themselves and live the life they were meant to live.
Do you have a story or experience you would like to share? I’d love to hear from you.
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